dedicated to you. 1. a perfect circle - three libras
2. atticus fault - veins
3. azure ray - displaced
4. azure ray - no signs of pain
5. bright eyes - the center of the world
6. chevelle - one lonely visitor
7. coldplay - yellow
8. dashboard confessional - this brilliant dance
9. death cab for cutie - bend to squares
10. jeff buckley - last goodbye
11. jimmy eat world - cautioners
12. pedro the lion - almost there
13. pedro the lion - indian summer
14. smashing pumpkins - ava adore
15. smashing pumpkins - stand inside your love
16. the juliana theory - don't push love away
17. vast - lady of dreams
18. voices on the verge - softly moses
the end, in your name, amen.
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October 05, 2002 @ 4:12 am
"music to slit your wrists to."
WHY DID I FUCKING HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU?
FOR THE FIRST TIME. I'M TELLING YOU. HOW MUCH I NEED AND BLEED FOR, YOUR EVERY MOVE AND WAKING SOUND. IN MY TIME. I'LL WRAP MY WIRE AROUND YOUR HEART. AND YOUR MIND. YOU'RE MINE FOREVER NOW.
i'm listening to this song, and i can't stop thinking about taking that road trip to pennsylvania and falling asleep with my head in your lap in the backseat and listening to this song and having it make perfect sense. and how,
clenched teeth and crying through tears, it's making the headache worse. it makes the pills more tangible. they're here as well.
Away Message: for some fucking reason, i thought i was invincible. and that you could never hurt me. i was wrong. i'm always wrong. (sitting here crying and trying to type through tears. i never remember it feeling this bad before.)
pedro the lion was once described to me as "music to slit your wrists to." i'm sitting here with my favorite razor and 22 songs on repeat. and it's fitting.
it really is.
mike is going to indiana tomorrow. diane and wendell are not going to be here. and omega will be at her father's. i will be in this house alone.
and that will be a dangerous place for me.
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